Better Than, Worse Than, Same As
Yesterday one of my dharma buddies (thank you, Thomas) turned me on to a really delightful — and quite humorous — talk by Bonnie Duran on mana (usually translated as “conceit”), which is one of the last of the ten fetters (or torments) to let go right before one attains full enlightenment. (Joseph Goldstein says that he loves it when he sees this one arise because he thinks: “Oh good, now I’m working on Arahantship!”)
Basically, mana is the thought: “I am better than someone else; I am worse than someone else; or I am equal to someone else.” (That last part can come as a bit of a surprise I know, but it’s problematic — just like the others — because any comparison or “measuring” of oneself against another creates a split in what is fundamentally — on the ultimate level — not separate.)
This topic might sound boring and technical, but this talk is DEFINITELY NOT. If you want a chance to laugh at yourself (who doesn’t need a chance to do that!) and to enjoy laughing with Bonnie as she laughs at herself — click here and listen to this talk!
Just So
All the Difficult Hours and Minutes
by Jane Hirshfield
All the difficult hours and minutes
are like salted plums in a jar.
Wrinkled, turned steeply into themselves,
they mutter something the color of shark fins to
the glass.
Just so, calamity turns toward calmness.
First a jar holds the umeboshi, then the rice does.
If There’s No Self….
I’m back from the CDL (Community Dharma Leader) training retreat…which was terrific, by the way…and am almost caught up with all the laundry, grocery shopping, emails, housekeeping, etc. that’s always a part of coming home from a trip — including starting to dive into some of dharmaseed talks I’ve missed while I was gone.
One of which is an especially terrific Q&A discussion with Joseph Goldstein from the 3-month retreat that’s in session right now at IMS (Insight Meditation Society). It starts with a question about what it means to take refuge, which prompts Joseph to talk quite inspiringly about the reality of enlightenment here and now, and then there’s another question from which he takes off into a great little riff on what he calls “the myth of intimacy” and then someone asks about the teaching of non-self as it relates to karma and reincarnation (“can you speak on who owns the karma?”).
Joseph begins his reply with: “Just so you know, I think the most frequently asked preface to a question is: If there’s no self, then…” Which prompts him to go into one of the most helpful explorations of the teaching of non-self I’ve heard in a very long time. And it just keeps getting better from there.
You can listen to the talk by clicking here. (His answer to the question about non-self starts at about the 20-minute mark.)
May wisdom arise in the pattern of an unfolding life…that’s called “you”.
On To The Next
I’m feeling much better, so now I’m preparing to leave on Saturday for the next CDL training retreat. I return on the following Saturday, so check back for my next post on Monday, Oct 3.
In the mean time, I leave you with yet another selection from my favorite guide for travelers: Invisible Cities, by Italo Calvino.
Trading Cities. 4.
In Ersilia, to establish the relationships that sustain the city’s life, the inhabitants stretch strings from the corners of the houses, white or black or gray or black-and-white according to whether they mark a relationship of blood, of trade, authority, agency. When the strings become so numerous that you can no longer pass among them, the inhabitants leave: the houses are dismantled; only the strings and their supports remain.
From a mountainside, camping with their household goods, Ersilia’s refugees look at the labyrinth of taunt strings and poles that rise in the plain. That is the city of Ersilia still, and they are nothing.
They rebuild Ersilia elsewhere. They weave a similar pattern of strings which they would like to be more complex and at the same time more regular than the other. Then they abandon it and take themselves and their houses still farther away.
Thus, when traveling in the territory of Ersilia, you come upon the ruins of the abandoned cities, without the walls which do not last, without the bones of the dead which the wind rolls away: spiderwebs of intricate relationships seeking a form.
I Am of the Nature to Have Ill Health
I’m trying not to be sick. I’ve had a sore throat for about 5 days. My eyes feel hot. And so does my face.
Now I’m starting to cough. And I can’t seem to muster the energy for a proper post.
So I think I’ll go to bed early.
May I be healthy.
And if not, may I remember that this is the way things are… and that it would be a good idea to drink plenty of liquids.
***
(image: rhino virus)
Always Blowing
Best not to forget there is no respite from the “eight worldly winds” of gain and loss, pleasure and pain, praise and blame, fame and disrepute.
Feedback
by Billy Collins
The woman who wrote from Phoenix
after my reading there
to tell me they were all still talking about it
just wrote again
to tell me that they had stopped
Traveling Metta
I’ll be leaving on Saturday for a week-long CDL (Community Dharma Leader) training retreat, which will be held at Garrison Institute on the bluffs overlooking the Hudson River, about an hour north of New York City. I love going to Garrison because the trip involves a gorgeous train ride (on the Hudson River Line), starting at Grand Central Station.
Which will be the perfect place to re-start a practice I used to do whenever I was traveling. I’d look around at people in airports or in cars on the highway or wherever I’d find myself when I was going from one place to another, and I’d say to them (silently) “may you be safe” or “may you be happy” or “peaceful” or “healthy” or whatever.
Sharon Salzberg calls this “Street Lovingkindness.” She made a series of great little videos about it….including one shot in Grand Central Station! It’s very inspiring. Check it out. (click here)
It Feels So Good to Feel Right
There is a truly wonderful article in the e-newsletter sent out today by the Barre Center for Buddhist Studies (BCBS). The title is a bit off-putting: “Part 2 of a Two-Part Interview on Vedana with Bhikkhu Analayo” but it’s a fabulous read.
Here’s a sample:
BCBS: “It’s not so uncommon for meditators to say things like, ‘Oh, that’s a view. That’s an opinion. I shouldn’t have those. I shouldn’t cling.’ Things can shift when we understand that there really is a payoff — we’re getting that pleasant feeling. Then maybe we can also understand, ‘Okay. There’s a reason why I’m doing this. There’s a reason why I’m clinging.’ Then it’s no longer a matter of being crazy or delusional or bad. Once we see what we’re getting out of something, we can decide whether or not it’s really worth what we’re giving up to get it.”
Ven. Analayo: “Yes. That’s exactly the point. And it’s a gradual path. It’s not that suddenly you have no more attachment to views. The point is just to be aware of it. That’s all. Every moment I’m aware of the hedonic part of my clinging is a moment when I’m learning to live with cognitive dissonance — learning to live with not being the way I would like to be. And this is precisely what I want. I want to be able to be with myself when I’m not the way I want to be. Because this is the reality of the present moment. And from there, step by step, the gradual improvement happens.”
BCBS: “So beautiful, Bhante. It’s easy to miss that part and think, ‘I’m not allowed to have strong views anymore. I shouldn’t form strong opinions.’ But looked at in this way, you can have strong views and opinions. It’s just a matter of not clinging to them.
Ven. Atalayo: “The Buddha had very strong views. When a monk would misrepresent his teaching, he’d call him and say, ‘You are a fool. What did you say? Did I ever teach that?’ Scolding him in front of everyone. And the monk sits there, shoulders drooping, head down, sad, unable to talk. The Buddha really lets him know it, but there’s no aversion there, no clinging. Now, we’re not in the position of the Buddha, and we don’t have to be so strong. But it’s not a matter of becoming blurry and not knowing what is right and wrong — that is not the point. The point is simply allowing the basic capacity of mindfulness to see the whole situation……
“And this is all based on feeling. It’s all based on this awareness of the hedonic side. Maybe we don’t catch it at the moment it happens in discussion, but we can see it afterwards. ‘Yes. At that point I got really excited. And I had all those strong feeling, and then I went really overboard with the way I was discussing it.’ Just acknowledge it. Not saying, ‘Oh, I shouldn’t have done it.’ No. Just being aware that this is how it happened. And the next time closer to it, closer to it, and eventually we’ll notice it right at the time it happens. And maybe at that time we can just let it go.”
***
To read the full interview, click here.
Every Seat in the House
No time for a proper post, so instead I’ll share this photo of my living room, which I’ve just gotten ready for the “Let’s Talk Dharma” discussion tonight…by bringing in every single chair in the whole house!
Kind of Like Being There
Last night I listened to Guy Armstrong give the opening talk at this year’s 3-month retreat at IMS (Insight Meditation Society, shown here).
I sat the first 6 weeks of that retreat in 2013 (Guy was one of my interview teachers) and I thought then that surely I’d be back for the full 3 months…if not the following year (2014), then definitely by the year after that (2015). But alas, here it is 2016 and well, it hasn’t quite worked out like that.
Still, it was great to “be there in spirit” by listening to the tape and to feel a kinship with all those who are there this year (one of whom is our former St. Louis sangha member, Leslie!) It renewed my commitment to sit a 3-month retreat. And gave a sweet little boost to my practice!
If you’d like some of that too, I recommend listening to Guy’s talk. He leads the group in the traditional retreat practice of reciting the Three Refuges and Five Precepts (which is a nice thing to do at home as well) and he also adds some very interesting information and reflections on the historical Buddha, which I don’t think I’ve ever heard done before. It’s not like actually being on the retreat…but it’s kind of like that.
Click here to listen to the talk. (56 minutes)