2016
Walking the Question
Phillip Moffitt gave a unique twist to one of the periods of Walking Meditation we did at the Retreat-in-a-Box for Care Providers last Sunday. He started with the regular instructions: walk about 10 to 20 paces, back and forth, at whatever speed feels comfortable, paying mindful attention to the lower part of your body and perhaps lightly noting “step, step” or “lifting, moving, placing” to help keep your attention on your body. But then he added:
Before you start the actual walking practice, stand for a minute and silently ask yourself this question: What would be most nourishing for me as I perform my role as a care provider? (Or: What do I need to do to take care of myself? Or whatever question comes into your mind.)
Ask the question silently 3 times, then drop it (as best you can). Start your walking meditation, as instructed. Don’t try to come up with an answer. If the question comes back into your mind, try to let it go. Turn your attention to the noting: “step, step,” or “lifting, moving, placing” etc. Do the same if you find yourself trying to answer the question. Just do the normal practice. Then, when the walking period is over, stop and silently ask yourself the question again. Wait for a moment and see what happens.
He said that he has used this practice on several occasions, particularly when he needed to make a decision and couldn’t find any practical/rational basis on which to make it. Sometimes, nothing happens. But often it does. Sometimes the answer presents itself immediately and it’s not what you would have expected, but you recognize it and you know the truth of it. Sometimes nothing comes right away, but you feel like something in you has shifted. And sometimes, you realize you were asking the wrong question!
And Then There’s the Jump
I mentioned karma in yesterday’s post, referring to the “deeply ingrained habit patterns” that tend to play out in one’s life over and over, so for today I thought I’d expand on that a bit by sharing what I’ve been listening to Ajahn Sucitto say about karma (kamma in Pali).
“Kamma is both action and the results of action. It can be mental action [thoughts], verbal action [words], or bodily action [physically doing something]. Kamma is a decisive engagement with a mental perception….something arises in the mind, there’s a triggering, and then there is a reaction…a “jump”.
“There is a sense of engagement and then something gets going, the story starts spinning, and then you’re off…. You don’t notice the jump, you just noticed where you’ve jumped to…and then you’re in that so-called reality.
“That’s kamma. Something decisively catches and then there’s the reaction. Something touches and there’s a hold and then the jump.
“This habitual reaction can be released.
“The release comes through disengaging from the compulsion, then starting to make increasingly wiser and more informed choices about where to place one’s attention.
“There is a shift from the trigger to the awareness of the trigger. And then the trigger is dismantled. By itself!
“Release is actually involuntary. There is a voluntary decisive engagement and action to penetrate to the place of the trigger, then to widen into the awareness of that, then to hold the awareness….but then the release is involuntary.”
***
The above is very much edited. Click here to listen to the whole talk. (It’s 65 minutes long and totally worth it!!!)
A Distant Chime Goes Off
I had a visit yesterday from, well, you could say an old boyfriend, but our relationship was more significant (and more complicated) than that…at least the effect of the relationship on me was more significant — and more complicated — than that. I’m not sure I could say the effect was the same for him, although clearly whatever effect it had was long lasting.
It’s been about 7 or 8 years since I saw him last — since I spent a significant (and complicated) weekend with him in Germany, where he lives — and before that, it had been more like 15 years since I’d seen him, and before that….well, the whole thing started more than 30 years ago and while it did not exactly continued, it did not exactly finish either. (The photo is of us, in Italy, about 20 years ago.)
So why am I posting this on Dharma Town, you might ask. Where’s the Dharma in it? I’m not exactly sure. It has something to do with my ability now to be able to recognize deeply ingrained habit patterns that have been playing out in my life over and over (which is karma). And something to do with wanting to acknowledge what’s changed for me over those past 7 or 8 years — my ability now to be aware and present for what’s actually happening and what I’m actually feeling about it (which is mindfulness).
And now, for some reason, this too feels like Dharma:
What Narcissism Means to Me
by Tony Hoagland
There’s Socialism and Communism and Capitalism,
said Neal,
and there’s Feminism and Hedonism,
and there’s Catholicism and Bipedalism, and Consumerism,
but I think Narcissism is the system
that means the most to me;
and Sylvia said that in Neal’s case
narcissism represented a heroic achievement in positive thinking.
And Ann,
who calls everybody Sweetie pie
whether she cares for them or not,
Ann lit a cigarette and said, Only miserable people will tell you
that love has to be deserved,
and when I heard that, a distant chime went off for me,
remembering a time when I believed
that I could simply live without it.
Neal had grilled the corn and sliced the onions
into thick white disks,
and piled the wet green pickles
up in stacks like coins
and his chef’s cap was leaning sideways like a mushroom cloud.
Then Ethan said that in his opinion,
if you’re going to mess around with self-love
you shouldn’t just rush into a relationship,
and Sylvia was weeping softly now, looking down
into her wine cooler and potato chips,
and then the hamburgers were done, just as
the sunset in the background started
cutting through the charcoal clouds
exposing their insides–black,
streaked dark red,
like a slab of scorched, rare steak,
delicious but unhealthy,
or, depending on your perspective,
unhealthy but delicious,
–the way that, deep inside the misery
of daily life,
love lies bleeding.
Things As They Are
Perspective Without Any Point
in Which It Might Vanish
by Jane Hirshfield
It Might Vanish
The way the green or blue or yellow in a painting
is simply green and yellow and blue,
and tree is, boat is, sky is
in them also —
There are worlds
in which nothing is adjective, everything noun.
This among them.
Even today–this falling day–
it might be so.
Footstep, footstep, footstep intimate on it.
To Not Tune Out
I want to share this message, which was posted yesterday on the Spirit Rock home page. I want to say that I, too, acknowledge all that is written below, especially the words I have highlighted in bold.
****
A Week of Tragedy
by Phillip Moffitt, Co-Guiding Teacher
We join all of the members of the Spirit Rock community in acknowledging the tragedy of the three shootings that occurred last week (July 3-9, 2016). We offer compassion and support to the families and loved ones of those lost, and to the communities that have been torn apart in anger, fear and grief. So many voices are crying out that this violence must stop, and we add our voice to this plea.
We also acknowledge that for change in attitude and interpretation to occur there needs to be an acknowledgement of the systemic level of institutional racism in our society that leads some police officers to delusional actions based on false perceptions coming from anxiety and fears that have been conditioned into their view of the world. Likewise, we acknowledge that any kind of violent response only gives false validation to the very misperception of seeing others as different and dangerous that is at the root of this tragedy while causing additional suffering. We stand for unity that says all Americans need to be safe in order for any Americans to be truly safe and that all Americans must be recognized in their dignity and lawful rights in order for any Americans to have sustainable dignity and rights.
The Buddha’s teachings begin with the truth that there is suffering, and we have witnessed this truth in Orlando, FL, Falcon Heights, MN, Baton Rouge, LA, Dallas, TX, and in many others places and actions too numerous to name, just in this country alone. The Buddha’s Second Noble Truth is that suffering is caused by the grasping mind that in its delusion and ignorance seeks happiness, safety and stability from things that cannot possibly provide these benefits. The Buddha offers a path to the end of this suffering composed of wise understanding, wise intention, wise speech, wise action and wise mindfulness along with other factors that lead to wisdom and compassion.
In this time of pain and turmoil, it is vital that we utilize our mindfulness and compassion to not tune out, but to stay present, to be willing to be with our anger, grief, fear and sadness.
It is our mindfulness practice that allows us to realize how we too may be inadvertently contributing to the underlying causes of this fear and alienation in our culture. It is our practice of compassion that allows us to see how others like ourselves think, speak and act from ignorance and delusion so that we do not make enemies out of anyone, but rather unite in our efforts to bring change. It is our wisdom that allows us to condemn harmful actions and wrong views without condemning the individuals that experience them. It is our hard-won equanimity that allows us to stay the course and to do our various parts — small and large — to end systemic misunderstanding, prejudice and violence.
May we as a community support one another during this agony, may we stay present for it in loving-kindness such that we can in some small way help relieve suffering.
It Will Not Fill Up
As I’ve said before, I’ve recently been listening to a lot of talks by Ajahn Sucitto. After almost every one of them I immediately want to put up a post about how great it was, how deep it was, how enlightening it was….but of course I know how I feel when somebody is always going on and on about some book, or movie, or podcast they’ve just read or watched or listened to… So, OK, I don’t want to do that.
But….
I’ll just share this one little quote from one of those talks, which is a metaphor that I’ve heard him use before and has continued to stay with me. Here it is (slightly edited for clarity):
“We think that sense of craving we feel is because something’s lacking. But it’s not. You can tip anything you like into that hole….it will not fill up. You can tip motorbikes; you can tip yachts; you can tip houses; you can tip a billion dollars into that hole….and it will not fill up. Because it’s not a hole. It’s a lump. So the more things you try to tip into it, the bigger it gets… It’s not an absence. It’s an energy. A very powerful energy that’s like a presence. Not an absence, but a presence. Of something confused… It’s an energy. And it can be released.”
***
Just in case you want to listen, it’s from this talk. It’s about an hour long. The quote starts at about the 35 minute mark.
A Blessing
…with a nod to Mary Oliver:
A Blessing
by James Wright
Just off the highway to Rochester, Minnesota,
Twilight bounds softly forth on the grass.
And the eyes of those two Indian ponies
Darken with kindness.
They have come gladly out of the willows
To welcome my friend and me.
We step over the barbed wire into the pasture
Where they have been grazing all day, alone.
They ripple tensely, they can hardly contain their happiness
That we have come.
They bow shyly as wet swans. They love each other.
There is no loneliness like theirs.
At home once more, they begin munching the young tufts of spring in the darkness.
I would like to hold the slenderer one in my arms,
For she has walked over to me
And nuzzled my left hand.
She is black and white,
Her mane falls wild on her forehead,
And the light breeze moves me to caress her long ear
That is delicate as the skin over a girl’s wrist.
Suddenly I realize
That if I stepped out of my body I would break
Into blossom.
Comfortable. Enjoyable. Grounded.
Instructions for Walking Meditation usually include something about making a mental note of “Lifting, Moving, Placing” or maybe something about “Contact” or “Pressure,” but I recently listened to a very different set of instructions given by Ajahn Sucitto, in which he talks about moving “simply, gracefully, flowing,” about how “nothing moves like the body…the mind jumps…but the body flows” and how “the joy of embodiment is the heart/mind picking up this lovely quality of flow….beginning to come home because it’s comfortable, it’s enjoyable, it’s grounded.”
What a beautiful set of instructions (and only 13 minutes long)! Listen here.
In Some Lovely Wild Place
A Lesson from James Wright
by Mary Oliver
If James Wright
could put in his book of poems
a blank page
dedicated to “the Horse David
Who Ate One of My Poems,” I am ready
to follow him along
the sweet path he cut
through the dryness
and suggest that you sit now
very quietly
in some lovely wild place, and listen
to the silence
And I say that this, too,
is a poem.
Let’s Talk Dharma
For those of you who haven’t already heard, I’m starting a new “Let’s Talk Dharma” Discussion Group. Here’s the email announcement I sent out yesterday:
*** As many of you know, I am in the middle of a 2-year Community Dharma Leader (CDL) training program led by Spirit Rock. The focus of the program right now is on learning to develop/organize/teach day-long events and multi-week series of classes. We are encouraged to take a creative approach to this, so instead of offering a standard introductory course on basic Buddhist teachings, I’ve decided to try a series of once-a-month Dharma discussion “classes”, each focusing on a single topic of interest. Thus:
*** INTRODUCING: “LET’S TALK DHARMA” DISCUSSION SERIES ***
When: 3rd Thursday of each month, beginning July 21, 7:00pm to 8:30pm
Where: My house (in Dogtown)
Format: 20-minute sit, teaching on a selected topic, Q&A, discussion
Cost: Dana (This means the teachings are offered freely. Donations to support these teachings will be freely accepted.)
Schedule:
July 21: The Buddha’s Teaching on KARMA
August 18: The Buddha’s Teaching on RIGHT LIVELIHOOD
September 15: The Buddha’s Teaching on ENLIGHTENMENT
October 20: To be determined
November 17: To be determined
December 15: To be determined
Note: SPACE IS VERY LIMITED. You do NOT need to attend every session, but for each session you do attend, you WILL NEED to RESERVE YOUR PLACE.
For more information and/or to sign up, email Jan here.